Love is like a game of chess. One false move and you're married.
Falling for you was like slipping on a banana peel; I didn't plan on it, and now I'm head over heels.
They say you can't put a price on love, but have you seen the cost of the average wedding these days?
Love is a two-way street constantly under construction.
You know it's true love when they steal a pizza slice from your plate and you still want to share your dessert.
Love makes people do silly things. For instance, it made me send you good morning texts just to make you smile.
I love you more than coffee, but please don't make me prove it.
I told you I love you and you sneezed. I'll take it as a 'God bless you' to our future together.
The true test of love is not when we are together. It's when we are apart and you still don't change the Netflix password.
If you think about it, 'unconditional love' is really just a synonym for 'putting up with each other's weirdness.'
You must be a magician, because whenever I look at you, everyone else disappears. That or you owe a lot of people money.
Loving you was inevitable. Like tripping over my own feet or getting hit by bird poop on a supposedly lucky day.
They say love is blind. I disagree. After all, I've seen your morning face and I'm still here.
If kisses were snowflakes, I'd send you a blizzard. But given our luck, we'd get caught in a snowstorm without an umbrella.
My love for you is like a fart – impossible to hide and sometimes embarrassingly loud.
I told you I love you, and you asked 'Why?' I said 'Because you're you.' I think that's when you realized you're stuck with me.
You had me at 'Leave me alone, I’m watching the game.'
Relationships are like fat people. Most of them don't work out.
Our love is like a smartphone – multifunctional and prone to random malfunctions.
Being with you is less like a romantic novel and more like a sitcom, but I love every hilarious moment.
Sometimes I look at you and wonder how I got to be so lucky. Then I remember, oh right, I abducted you from another universe.
If you want to know how much I love you, we'll need to get you a ladder, because it's way more than you can jump.
My love for you is like diarrhea, I just can't hold it in.
If we were on a sinking ship together, and there was only one life vest, I would miss you terribly and read the eulogy at your funeral.
I love you because with you, every meal is a candlelit dinner, even when it's just takeaway pizza.
You're the peanut butter to my jelly – you make my life sticky but oh so sweet.
Let's be weird and wonderful together, because normal is so overrated.
Love is telling someone their hair extensions are showing and not feeling bad about it.
You are the cheese to my macaroni. Without you, I'm just plain noodles.
Love is like a backache, it doesn't show up on X-rays, but you know it's there.
If laughing at your bad jokes is a sign of love, then we must be soulmates.
Ever since I met you, I've been collecting smiles like a kid in a candy store, and I've got a lot of cavities to prove it.
You are my favorite notification.
Our relationship is like a good bra: supportive, hard to find, and close to my heart.
I'm not a photographer, but I can picture us together forever. Or at least until we can't stand each other.
If love is an open door, I must have walked into the cupboard by mistake. But I'm glad because that's where I found the snacks – you, I mean. I found you.
They say opposites attract. That's lucky for me because I'm smart, and you're... well, you're super adorable.
I adore you as much as cats love chasing laser dots. And I'm the dot.
If love is a battlefield, then I'm glad you're both my ally and my medic.
You're basically like pizza: even when you're bad, you're good.
If you are what you eat, then I love you double, because today you are some extra fine chocolate.
In the journey of our love, I'm glad I took the scenic route... where I tripped over you.
I love you like a squirrel loves nuts, I guess that makes you the nut.
You are the exclamation mark in the happiest sentence I could ever write.
You must be a ninja because you snuck into my heart without me noticing.
I love you more than a lazy Sunday morning—which is a lot, considering my dedication to sleep.
If I were to write a dictionary, ‘you’ would be synonymous with ‘love’—and also 'weird', because you're one in a million.
You're the only one I want to annoy for the rest of my life.
If love is a language, then I am fluent in 'crazy about you'.
Having you in my life is like adding ketchup to fries – essential and delicious.
You must be a dictionary because you add meaning to my life.
My love for you is like a circle it just goes on and on; it’s pointless.
I’d give up my morning coffee just to see you smile… No, wait, let’s not get too drastic.
Love is sharing your popcorn, especially when it's the last piece.
If loving you is wrong, then I never want to be right. But, I mean, I'd like to be right about other things, like trivia night at the pub.
You make my heart leap, and not just when you surprise me with spiders.
If love is an adventure, then you must be the treasure I've been searching for—hopefully without a booby trap.
You are like a software update; I keep ignoring you, but you still pop up and make me smile.
You know love is real when you've memorized their order at your favorite fast food place.
Love is a lot like gas, if you have to force it, it's probably crap.
If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put U and I together and leave out the rest because let's face it, they're just third wheels.
You must be the speed of light because time stops when I look at you.
My love for you is like my car's check engine light – it just keeps on lighting up no matter what.
Whenever I say ‘I love you,’ I’m not just repeating a phrase, I’m reminding you that you're my favorite weirdo.
If kisses were seeds, I'd plant you a garden of infinite affection. Also, we'd save a lot on groceries.
We go together like copy and paste, which is fitting considering how often I steal your fries.
Your love is like bacon – it makes everything better.
Hey, if you ever feel cold, you can use my love as a blanket. It might not be very warm, but it has good intentions.
For you, I'll climb the highest shelf... even in the supermarket, because love also means reaching the top shelf goodies.
You know it's true love when you're ready to share your wifi password.
They say kiss a lot of frogs to find your prince. With you, I hit the jackpot on the first ribbit.
If you were a vegetable, you'd be a cute-cumber, and I'd be the farmer that picked you with love.
I love you like I love finding extra fries at the bottom of the bag – immensely and with great surprise.
You make my heart flutter like a butterfly that saw a particularly exciting flower.
My heart skips a beat whenever I see you, which is kind of alarming, but in a charming way.
Love is not having to hold your farts in anymore.
My love for you is like an iPhone battery – it might die by the end of the day, but hey, tomorrow we'll recharge.
I promised to hold you in sickness and in health, but please stop sneezing on me—I still have my limits.
If you’re ever feeling down, just remember, I love you almost as much as I love my dog.
You are the 'happily' in my 'ever after.'
If my love for you was a pair of socks, we would be a match. And also I'd never find the second one when I need it.
I fell for you like an autumn leaf: gracefully, and then all at once all over the front lawn.
Your love is like a good book; it keeps me awake at night and sneaks into my thoughts when I should be working.
You're kind of, sort of, basically, pretty much always on my mind. Except when I’m hungry.
If you were a fruit, you'd be a fineapple, and I'd be the one who brought the rum.
Together we're like a spicy chili – a little bit crazy and hot enough to make your eyes water.
If I could wish upon a shooting star, I'd wish for you. But I'd probably end up with a concussion because I'm not good at catching.
My love for you is like a candle. If you forget about me, I'll burn your house down.
I used to believe in natural beauty. Then I met you and thought, well, makeup does wonders too.
You’re like the charger to my smartphone life, pretty essential and sometimes hard to find.
I love you so much, I would even share my secret stash of chocolate with you. That's a lie. But the love part is true.
If love was a sport, we'd be world champions. Especially in synchronized snoring.
I swear I couldn't love you more than I do right now, and yet I know I will tomorrow. Unless you snore like a freight train again.
